Most of the time everything was fine but there was a prolonged and very real period of self-doubt. Through that doubt I came to the conclusion that as difficult as this path was, I didn’t want to be chosen. That implied a lack of free will, as if some God came down and scooped me up - rather than a mutual coming together. Over the course of the next few years various small signs started to point the way and I found a Deity I was comfortable with. I read all about them, meditated on them and eventually ended up contacting them. Even then, there was no fanfare or a definite sign that this was “meant to be”. More years passed and the relationship just grew slowly and organically until one day I had turned around and realised that I had what I'd been seeking all those years. That relationship crept up on my without my really noticing, I had a real euphoric moment at that point but it was all the more precious because it was so hard won. It wasn’t an overnight experience which overwhelmed my mortal emotions. It was a long, slow road which was full of self-doubt, misinterpretation and days when I felt like nothing was working. Only by continuing to persevere did I get what I wanted, and after all that I was at least certain it was what I wanted.
So this is a message of encouragement to all the Unchosen ones. I wanted to write this because, this it the post I needed to be reading about 8 years ago to give me some sorely needed confidence and determination. If you are not chosen by a particular God or Goddess then Don't Depair!There is a relationship out there for you. It may not come easily, but just because no-one melts your mind in a meditation and calls you by your name the first time you contact them, doesn't mean you won't end up having a meaningful relationship. Sometimes you need to work hard to get someone's attention!